Overcome School-Related Anxiety And Making Friends – Part 2
Sunday, October 15, 2023
Sunday, October 15, 2023
Overcome School-Related Anxiety And Making Friends – Part 2
Sunday, October 15, 2023
Overcome School-Related Anxiety And Making Friends – Part 2
In this video you’ll discover practical strategies to help your child overcome school-related anxiety and making friends.
Welcome to the second part of our journey in helping your child overcome school-related anxiety and making friends.
In Part 1 , we dove deep into the world of school-related anxiety and shared invaluable insights on how to ease those school-time jitters.
If you missed it, you can click here to view Part 1 for the first step to solving this challenge and get your child started on the path to school confidence.
In that previous blog post, Lucy, one of the parents within my CALM Parents and Kids Hub, explained the challenges her daughter has been having with school-related anxiety and making friends. We discussed how the first part of the solution was to understand that
these issues – school-related anxiety and making friends – are in fact two separate issues.
So last week we looked at strategies to overcome the first issue: school-related anxiety.
Now, it's time to tackle the second half of the equation: making friends. We all know how essential these connections are, and we’re handing you the keys to unlock your child's social potential.
Let's keep the momentum going… watch the video below to help your child to thrive throughout their school years:
Use Their Language:
Now we've got the other part of this challenge which is Lucy’s daughter’s lack of a belief that she can make friends easily. So at the moment, we're not going to push making friends. What we're going to start thinking about and focusing on is, “What is awesome about you?”
However, ‘awesome’ is my word. She might not relate to that word, nor might your child
NOTE: We use our kids' language. We don't have to swear, but we use their language, because their words land better than our words being put into their head. So when we are talking to our kids, we want to talk in their language. So whatever it is, I would love for you to be helping to notice some of their really awesome qualities.
Belief About Making Friends:
So in this scenario, Lucy’s daughter needs some building up. She needs some confidence building and some self-esteem building. So this will help a lot of people… hopefully it helps you, too.
Here’s an example of something I did with my grandson quite a bit.
We have just the most beautiful relationship. He's such a shy, introverted kid, but we just have a gorgeous relationship and for quite some time, he was really introverted and was quite anxious.
So I just started on little things. I said, “There goes that dimple. There it is again.”
And then he smirked. And I said, “There it is. You can't get rid of it, can you?”
We were just having some fun and playing, and I said, “I love that dimple on you.”
Now, he's 16 – about to turn 17. But what's that doing?
We just want them to start noticing that they’re just beautiful the way they are.
In the case of Lucy’s daughter, we want to help her to have those feel-good hormones flooding through her body. She's been in enough pain and anxiety and stress. It's time to bring some joy back.
And so at the same time as getting those feel-good hormones flowing, we're bringing joy, but we're also reminding her of how special she is and how much she matters.
So with making friends, this is what we’re doing at the moment. We are not going to worry too much about making friends.
Build Her Confidence… Subtly:
We want her to start loving herself again. We’re helping to notice some things. And it could be that she clears the plates on the table and you say, “You know, you are so considerate. I didn't even ask you. You just did it yourself. You're such a beautiful, considerate soul. Thank you.”
We want all as many little feel good moments as possible for her. It's time for her to start to believe, “Yeah, I AM considerate.”
Now, she might brush off the compliment, like many people do. Because, like, many kids who have got quite significant anxiety and are stopping themselves from succeeding (self-sabotaging) are not good at accepting compliments.
This is because deep down, she doesn't think she's worthy of success… in her unconscious mind. She's got a deep belief that she's not worthy… she's not worthy of making friends… she's not worthy of being able to go to school… and she's not worthy of success.
So it is time that she starts to acknowledge herself and love herself. She is worthy, but we need to rebuild this in her.
She wasn't born thinking these things. These are learned things. She's come to these conclusions herself. Which means that these can be unlearned as well.
These may only seem like tiny steps, but they are so much more powerful than they may look. They are the foundation for your child's journey toward building self-worth, which will help them to overcome school-related anxiety, create lasting friendships, and so much more.
You can help your child to progress, one confident step at a time.
See other posts like this one:
Sunday, October 19, 2025
Are You Unintentionally Invalidating Your Child? How to Respond with Empathy & Support
When your child is anxious—whether over school, friendships, or how they look—logic alone won’t help them feel safe. In this blog, Sue explores how well-meaning phrases like “don’t worry what others think” can unintentionally invalidate your child’s emotions. You'll learn how anxiety disrupts their ability to process reasoning, and how emotional validation creates the trust they need to open up. With real-life examples, validating phrases, and a 3-step practice, this blog offers a compassionate roadmap for building connection before correction.
Sunday, October 05, 2025
Does your child become distressed easily?
Does your child melt down over small issues, retreat to their room, or lash out with hurtful words? These aren’t just “tantrums”, they’re signs of Distress Intolerance (DI), when anxiety shows up as an inability to cope with tough emotions. Left unaddressed, DI can carry into teen and adult years, impacting relationships, careers, and wellbeing. But there’s good news: Distress Tolerance is a skill that can be learned and strengthened. In this blog, Sue explains what distress intolerance really is, why it emerges in childhood, and how it affects kids and families. She then shares a simple 5-step method parents can start using today: accept emotions instead of suppressing them, notice how feelings show up in the body, get curious about what’s being triggered, release pent-up energy through movement, and practise consistently until it becomes second nature. By modelling these steps first, parents can guide their child to build resilience, emotional competence, and a calmer, more connected life.
Wednesday, September 10, 2025
My Teen Won’t Go To School
School refusal isn’t laziness, defiance, or a parenting failure, it’s a nervous system stuck in survival mode. In this blog, Sue shares the raw truth behind why so many teens say, “I’ll go tomorrow” and then don’t. You’ll learn how anxiety, rejection, and emotional shutdowns are often behind the resistance, and how your child may be quietly overwhelmed, not oppositional. With powerful insights and compassionate scripts, this post offers: A breakdown of what school refusal really means A real-life example from a parent navigating this with her teen 12+ practical conversation openers you can try today A reminder that your calm presence, not pressure, is the turning point This blog is a lifeline for any parent navigating the emotional rollercoaster of school anxiety. Your child isn’t giving you a hard time, they’re having a hard time. And with the right approach, change is possible.
Welcome to the second part of our journey in helping your child overcome school-related anxiety and making friends.
In Part 1 , we dove deep into the world of school-related anxiety and shared invaluable insights on how to ease those school-time jitters.
If you missed it, you can click here to view Part 1 for the first step to solving this challenge and get your child started on the path to school confidence.
In that previous blog post, Lucy, one of the parents within my CALM Parents and Kids Hub, explained the challenges her daughter has been having with school-related anxiety and making friends. We discussed how the first part of the solution was to understand that
these issues – school-related anxiety and making friends – are in fact two separate issues.
So last week we looked at strategies to overcome the first issue: school-related anxiety.
Now, it's time to tackle the second half of the equation: making friends. We all know how essential these connections are, and we’re handing you the keys to unlock your child's social potential.
Let's keep the momentum going… watch the video below to help your child to thrive throughout their school years:
Use Their Language:
Now we've got the other part of this challenge which is Lucy’s daughter’s lack of a belief that she can make friends easily. So at the moment, we're not going to push making friends. What we're going to start thinking about and focusing on is, “What is awesome about you?”
However, ‘awesome’ is my word. She might not relate to that word, nor might your child
NOTE: We use our kids' language. We don't have to swear, but we use their language, because their words land better than our words being put into their head. So when we are talking to our kids, we want to talk in their language. So whatever it is, I would love for you to be helping to notice some of their really awesome qualities.
Belief About Making Friends:
So in this scenario, Lucy’s daughter needs some building up. She needs some confidence building and some self-esteem building. So this will help a lot of people… hopefully it helps you, too.
Here’s an example of something I did with my grandson quite a bit.
We have just the most beautiful relationship. He's such a shy, introverted kid, but we just have a gorgeous relationship and for quite some time, he was really introverted and was quite anxious.
So I just started on little things. I said, “There goes that dimple. There it is again.”
And then he smirked. And I said, “There it is. You can't get rid of it, can you?”
We were just having some fun and playing, and I said, “I love that dimple on you.”
Now, he's 16 – about to turn 17. But what's that doing?
We just want them to start noticing that they’re just beautiful the way they are.
In the case of Lucy’s daughter, we want to help her to have those feel-good hormones flooding through her body. She's been in enough pain and anxiety and stress. It's time to bring some joy back.
And so at the same time as getting those feel-good hormones flowing, we're bringing joy, but we're also reminding her of how special she is and how much she matters.
So with making friends, this is what we’re doing at the moment. We are not going to worry too much about making friends.
Build Her Confidence… Subtly:
We want her to start loving herself again. We’re helping to notice some things. And it could be that she clears the plates on the table and you say, “You know, you are so considerate. I didn't even ask you. You just did it yourself. You're such a beautiful, considerate soul. Thank you.”
We want all as many little feel good moments as possible for her. It's time for her to start to believe, “Yeah, I AM considerate.”
Now, she might brush off the compliment, like many people do. Because, like, many kids who have got quite significant anxiety and are stopping themselves from succeeding (self-sabotaging) are not good at accepting compliments.
This is because deep down, she doesn't think she's worthy of success… in her unconscious mind. She's got a deep belief that she's not worthy… she's not worthy of making friends… she's not worthy of being able to go to school… and she's not worthy of success.
So it is time that she starts to acknowledge herself and love herself. She is worthy, but we need to rebuild this in her.
She wasn't born thinking these things. These are learned things. She's come to these conclusions herself. Which means that these can be unlearned as well.
These may only seem like tiny steps, but they are so much more powerful than they may look. They are the foundation for your child's journey toward building self-worth, which will help them to overcome school-related anxiety, create lasting friendships, and so much more.
You can help your child to progress, one confident step at a time.
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Recent blogs:
Are You Unintentionally Invalidating Your Child? How to Respond with Empathy & Support
Sunday, October 19, 2025
When your child is anxious—whether over school, friendships, or how they look—logic alone won’t help them feel safe. In this blog, Sue explores how well-meaning phrases like “don’t worry what others think” can unintentionally invalidate your child’s emotions. You'll learn how anxiety disrupts their ability to process reasoning, and how emotional validation creates the trust they need to open up. With real-life examples, validating phrases, and a 3-step practice, this blog offers a compassionate roadmap for building connection before correction.
Does your child become distressed easily?
Sunday, October 05, 2025
Does your child melt down over small issues, retreat to their room, or lash out with hurtful words? These aren’t just “tantrums”, they’re signs of Distress Intolerance (DI), when anxiety shows up as an inability to cope with tough emotions. Left unaddressed, DI can carry into teen and adult years, impacting relationships, careers, and wellbeing. But there’s good news: Distress Tolerance is a skill that can be learned and strengthened. In this blog, Sue explains what distress intolerance really is, why it emerges in childhood, and how it affects kids and families. She then shares a simple 5-step method parents can start using today: accept emotions instead of suppressing them, notice how feelings show up in the body, get curious about what’s being triggered, release pent-up energy through movement, and practise consistently until it becomes second nature. By modelling these steps first, parents can guide their child to build resilience, emotional competence, and a calmer, more connected life.
My Teen Won’t Go To School
Wednesday, September 10, 2025
School refusal isn’t laziness, defiance, or a parenting failure, it’s a nervous system stuck in survival mode. In this blog, Sue shares the raw truth behind why so many teens say, “I’ll go tomorrow” and then don’t. You’ll learn how anxiety, rejection, and emotional shutdowns are often behind the resistance, and how your child may be quietly overwhelmed, not oppositional. With powerful insights and compassionate scripts, this post offers: A breakdown of what school refusal really means A real-life example from a parent navigating this with her teen 12+ practical conversation openers you can try today A reminder that your calm presence, not pressure, is the turning point This blog is a lifeline for any parent navigating the emotional rollercoaster of school anxiety. Your child isn’t giving you a hard time, they’re having a hard time. And with the right approach, change is possible.
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