How To Keep Your Cool When Your Anxious Child Is Losing It!
Sunday, April 23, 2023
Sunday, April 23, 2023
How To Keep Your Cool When Your Anxious Child Is Losing It!
Sunday, April 23, 2023
How To Keep Your Cool When Your Anxious Child Is Losing It!
Need help mastering the art of calm? This video shows you how to keep your cool when your anxious child is losing it!
As a parent (especially when you have an anxious child), the first thing you need to learn is how to keep your cool. Even when your child pushes all your buttons!
And they know exactly how to do that when they’re upset, don’t they?
Tantrums at the shops, meltdowns as you struggle to get everyone out the door on time…
Or even worse, outright defiance when you’re trying to get your child to cooperate for you.
It’s enough to make you want to scream!
Thankfully, there is a solution.
In the quick video below I show you a technique you can use to help you stay in control of your reactions even when you’re feeling frustrated.
This strategy will help you prevent making the situation worse. And in turn, you can help your child stay calm too.
Hello, it's Sue Stevenson here.
Does your child ever really push your buttons so much so that you feel like you're just going to totally lose it with them?
Is it any wonder we lose it with our kids sometimes?
I mean, we can only take so much, right?
The Guilt: I'll Never Do This Again!
And when you do end up screaming at your kids like a crazy woman, later that night while lying in bed feeling riddled with guilt and shame, you swear you'll never do this again.
But then the next morning comes around and here we go again. Your child's coming up with every excuse under the sun to avoid going to school. Or perhaps they're arguing with you or their siblings, or perhaps their anxieties just escalate because things just aren't going their way.
Whatever the reason, you’re feeling triggered because your child's pushed your buttons yet again. And you're trying so hard to stay calm and not lose it with your child.
I get how stressful this is. I've been through it and it's just so infuriating because you feel like you're just going to explode.
So I want to share a three step strategy that really works for me and the parents and kids I work with.
Here are the three steps I want you to do…
Step 1
Firstly, instead of reacting while you're feeling angry, stop and hit the pause button. Take a step back and imagine that you are watching all this chaos in a movie.
And then I want you to take a big, deep, slow breath.
Just to ground yourself. I feel better already just from doing that.
Step 2
Then secondly, I want you to do this. It's called box breathing.
Imagine that this square I'm drawing right now is a box.
The first section of the box, I want you to breathe in a big, deep, slow breath while counting to four slowly. Breathe in through your nose and fill up your belly like you're inflating a balloon.
So four counts in, and then I want you to pause for four counts.
And then after you've paused for four counts, I want you to breathe out for four counts, and while you're breathing out, fully expel all the air from your lungs.
Then pause for four counts.
Then I want you to repeat this… in for four counts. Pause out for four counts and pause as many times as it takes until you feel calmer.
You see, pausing and doing this box breathing helps you change your body's physiological state because you can't be highly anxious and also feel calm and breathe deeply and slowly at the same time.
I want you to be able to calm yourself just so that you are ready for those pressure moments. This will help you to better manage situations with your anxious child.
Step 3
And then thirdly, what I want you to do is to practice this box breathing as much as you can. Practice it while you're feeling relaxed, because it's hard to learn new things when you're feeling stressed or anxious.
I've got a client right now who's practicing this every time they go to the bathroom.
Now I often say that anxiety is contagious, but so is calm energy. So by calming yourself using this box breathing, your calm energy will transfer onto others in your household.
Let’s Recap
So just to recap… in those moments when your anxious child pressures you and you feel like you're about to lose it with them, firstly stop… step away… and take a deep breath and ground yourself.
Then secondly, do your box breathing until you're feeling calm.
And then thirdly, keep practicing your box breathing until you’re really good at it so that when you do need it, you can calm yourself down.
Okay, now I want you to go and practice this technique straight away once you've finished watching this video, so you are ready to handle the next time your child pushes your buttons.
See other posts like this one:
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Tuesday, May 27, 2025
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When a 9-year-old girl sees “her anxiety” as a lifelong identity, it starts holding her back. She stops enjoying her favorite activities. Her parents realize she’s developed the internal belief that her anxiety means she can’t have fun and she is broken. To help their daughter become courageous and resilient (and get her back to having fun), they focus on rewriting her internal beliefs – including the belief that anxiety is something she has to deal with forever.
Monday, May 12, 2025
Is school failing your anxious child? Melissa’s story
After moving to a new school at 11 years old, Noah’s anxiety took a turn for the worse. The last three years have been a nightmare for him and his mum. Mum Melissa has waited for the experts at school to solve the problem. But nothing they try is working. Finally, Melissa realises that it’s up to her to lead the charge. Read on to see how Melissa figured out the solution that let Noah become a thriving, happy child again.
As a parent (especially when you have an anxious child), the first thing you need to learn is how to keep your cool. Even when your child pushes all your buttons!
And they know exactly how to do that when they’re upset, don’t they?
Tantrums at the shops, meltdowns as you struggle to get everyone out the door on time…
Or even worse, outright defiance when you’re trying to get your child to cooperate for you.
It’s enough to make you want to scream!
Thankfully, there is a solution.
In the quick video below I show you a technique you can use to help you stay in control of your reactions even when you’re feeling frustrated.
This strategy will help you prevent making the situation worse. And in turn, you can help your child stay calm too.
Hello, it's Sue Stevenson here.
Does your child ever really push your buttons so much so that you feel like you're just going to totally lose it with them?
Is it any wonder we lose it with our kids sometimes?
I mean, we can only take so much, right?
The Guilt: I'll Never Do This Again!
And when you do end up screaming at your kids like a crazy woman, later that night while lying in bed feeling riddled with guilt and shame, you swear you'll never do this again.
But then the next morning comes around and here we go again. Your child's coming up with every excuse under the sun to avoid going to school. Or perhaps they're arguing with you or their siblings, or perhaps their anxieties just escalate because things just aren't going their way.
Whatever the reason, you’re feeling triggered because your child's pushed your buttons yet again. And you're trying so hard to stay calm and not lose it with your child.
I get how stressful this is. I've been through it and it's just so infuriating because you feel like you're just going to explode.
So I want to share a three step strategy that really works for me and the parents and kids I work with.
Here are the three steps I want you to do…
Step 1
Firstly, instead of reacting while you're feeling angry, stop and hit the pause button. Take a step back and imagine that you are watching all this chaos in a movie.
And then I want you to take a big, deep, slow breath.
Just to ground yourself. I feel better already just from doing that.
Step 2
Then secondly, I want you to do this. It's called box breathing.
Imagine that this square I'm drawing right now is a box.
The first section of the box, I want you to breathe in a big, deep, slow breath while counting to four slowly. Breathe in through your nose and fill up your belly like you're inflating a balloon.
So four counts in, and then I want you to pause for four counts.
And then after you've paused for four counts, I want you to breathe out for four counts, and while you're breathing out, fully expel all the air from your lungs.
Then pause for four counts.
Then I want you to repeat this… in for four counts. Pause out for four counts and pause as many times as it takes until you feel calmer.
You see, pausing and doing this box breathing helps you change your body's physiological state because you can't be highly anxious and also feel calm and breathe deeply and slowly at the same time.
I want you to be able to calm yourself just so that you are ready for those pressure moments. This will help you to better manage situations with your anxious child.
Step 3
And then thirdly, what I want you to do is to practice this box breathing as much as you can. Practice it while you're feeling relaxed, because it's hard to learn new things when you're feeling stressed or anxious.
I've got a client right now who's practicing this every time they go to the bathroom.
Now I often say that anxiety is contagious, but so is calm energy. So by calming yourself using this box breathing, your calm energy will transfer onto others in your household.
Let’s Recap
So just to recap… in those moments when your anxious child pressures you and you feel like you're about to lose it with them, firstly stop… step away… and take a deep breath and ground yourself.
Then secondly, do your box breathing until you're feeling calm.
And then thirdly, keep practicing your box breathing until you’re really good at it so that when you do need it, you can calm yourself down.
Okay, now I want you to go and practice this technique straight away once you've finished watching this video, so you are ready to handle the next time your child pushes your buttons.
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Recent blogs:
Step #1 to heal your child’s anxiety
Wednesday, July 02, 2025
Parents rush to fix anxiety—but skip the most important step. Clarity comes first. Know what’s driving your child’s anxiety, uncover your blind spots, and define a clear vision. That’s how you move from surviving to thriving—together.
Anxiety Is Not a Life Sentence: Kierra’s Story
Tuesday, May 27, 2025
When a 9-year-old girl sees “her anxiety” as a lifelong identity, it starts holding her back. She stops enjoying her favorite activities. Her parents realize she’s developed the internal belief that her anxiety means she can’t have fun and she is broken. To help their daughter become courageous and resilient (and get her back to having fun), they focus on rewriting her internal beliefs – including the belief that anxiety is something she has to deal with forever.
Is school failing your anxious child? Melissa’s story
Monday, May 12, 2025
After moving to a new school at 11 years old, Noah’s anxiety took a turn for the worse. The last three years have been a nightmare for him and his mum. Mum Melissa has waited for the experts at school to solve the problem. But nothing they try is working. Finally, Melissa realises that it’s up to her to lead the charge. Read on to see how Melissa figured out the solution that let Noah become a thriving, happy child again.
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